Sigh....

....

It seems all my effort i've put in is all goin down

Since after i'm single for 1 and a half year.
And finally got 1 relationship thought that can prolong.
But seems i'm wrong again this time.

Everytime go out see other couples.
Some very long relationship like my friends 2 years or even longer than that.

I wanted to have a long term relationship
but it seems all goin down.

Either feeling faded, Run away with other guys or quarrel till very serious then break.
Sigh everytime this few things appear in my life of relationship.
I'm sick and tired le....

I thought of giving up
But i just don know why i cant do it
This feelings really makes feel like giving up my life too...

Nobody know how i feels.
Yet only myself.

....

....

Darling...

Don let small problem affect our relationship.
And now your feeling become abit only.

Now i don know what to do.
Its really hurting me alot.

It makes me, don wanna continue my life.
You know how it feels anot?

Everytime i wanna have a prolong relationship.
But end up things just keep happening.
Last time my ex, how she treat me i told u before le.

I don wanna have this kind of relationship again.

I just wanna prolong this relationship.
Isit so hard?

...

To My Love 1 Joanne.

....

Darling,

I'm so sorry how i treat u so badly and the things i said before.
I really feel bad of myself till i cant forgive myself.
Never care about your feelings.
And i never get to know u feel stress in your work.

But trust me this time.
I wont do the same thing as i did before or said to u before.
I promise u wont happen again.

Now i just wanna ask u for a chance for me.
Take your time and think.
I wont rush u de.
But i hope u choose carefully.
And this chance i asking for really important to me.
Because i really wanna be with u.
I wont ask for more. But just to be with u.

U got anything that makes u unhappy please tell me.
At least share with me le. Will feel much better.

And please don go and stress yourself.
If not u will feel more tired.
Just relax your mind and give yourself a rest.
Whenever u goin to sleep just don think so much.

I don want you to feel stress or what.
I rather i'm the 1 who feel stress or whatever u feel.
Then u will feel better.

My POP is coming on Wednesday 09/09/09
Really hope u will come because this is my once and for all de POP

Don't Leave Me.
I LOVE U 1314.
....
....

Hopefully things will go well....

....

I really start to hate myself more...
Sometimes i feel like ending my entire life.


Today is the first nights out and POP is coming...
Yet i'm not really happy...

Because her feeling is fading...
Is all my fault never notice it...

Never care for her feeling...

Nothing is more important then her...
No matter how tired i am,
How poor i am,

I want her to have the very best.
Want her to be happy everytime,
Make her relax abit rather than feeling so stress about her work.

She is my only 1 in my heart no 1 will overtake her inside me...
I LOVE U JOANNE